0point6eight Seconds
by LuckyDuck29
Summary: What was Data thinking during the short time he was tempted by the Borg Queen? This is rated T, just to be on the safe side, because of the concept of sex. Please see my profile for the link to the ld29info forum for the author's notes.


"You are in chaos, Data," the Borg Queen said. "You are the contradiction; a machine who wishes to become human."

She claims to bring order to chaos, that she and the Borg strive to bring themselves and others closer to perfection. My idea of perfection is humanity.

She reactivated my emotion chip and began grafting organic skin onto my endoskeletol structure. It feels wonderful!

I wonder how it would feel to touch the Phoenix now, as Captain Picard and I did before. Would it feel different? Would it, as Captain Picard said, make the Phoenix more real to me? Would I be able to integrate physical stimuli into my life, as I have my emotions?

I never asked the Captain what it had been like to be part of the Borg collective. My ethical programming suggested that to do so would have been undiplomatic. I had established a link with him, but could not feel his emotions. I had no emotions myself then. If it was like this for him, I know now what he was feeling; fear, anxiety, anger, helplessness. But I also feel intrigued and excited. The Borg Queen wishes me to experience sexual pleasure with her. I have never experienced the act emotionally, and I have not experienced it physically the way humans do. She is giving me opportunities I never thought I would have.

Was the Captain tempted, as I am? Did a part of him wish to join the collective?

I would not have the chance to experience the physical touch of the Phoenix if I stayed with the Queen. Reality would be irrelevant. If I surrender to the Borg, I will give up my idea of perfection in favor of theirs. The thought of losing myself repulses me. This is not perfection; this is slavery! The Queen has given me human flesh, yes, but only to make me wish to be part of the collective. My new flesh is a treat held out to a pet, given only if the pet behaves the way the master wishes. I am not a pet!

Spot! If I stay with the Queen, no one will care for her! She cannot survive on the ship alone, and she does not like many of my fellow crew members. If the Borg succeed in assimilating the ship, what will they do to her?

The Captain escaped the Borg once. I hope he can do so again. He and the rest of the crew are the only hope for the defeat of the Borg and the success of First Contact.

This is not perfection. Still, it is pleasant to have real flesh.

The Queen damages my organic skin. It is a test to see what I will do. I cradle the injured arm. I tell her I am merely imitating humans.

"You're becoming more human all the time, Data," she informs me coldly. "Now you're learning how to lie."

It is against my programming to lie. Yet I did lie to her. Humans lie to protect themselves, or to protect another's feelings. Since installing the emotion chip, I have learned to lie to protect the feelings of others. I have learned sympathy, empathy and compassion. I would not intentionally cause another to feel something I would not wish to feel.

I believe I lied to protect my sense of self. I do not wish to be Borg. If I admit to wanting this flesh, to trying to protect it, how much closer am I to surrendering and accepting assimilation?

Is it flesh coupled with emotions that makes a person human? I lied to protect my emotions, as well as my flesh. Physical pain causes fear. The first time I was afraid, I was unable to function. My failure to act had endangered my best friend. Geordi had been kidnapped and implanted with a nanoprobe.

"Fear is irrelevant," the Borg would say. "Friendship is irrelevant."

If not for my friends, I would still be all machine. They taught me to be human; they encouraged me in my endeavors. They helped me grow as a person.

No! I will not surrender; I will not agree to be the Queen's equal! I have striven for humanity, my own perfection, all my life. I will not give up my humanity now!

There is a residue in the hive mind of the Captain as Locutus. I am now part Borg. I heard Captain Picard tell Counselor Troy that he could hear the Borg. Perhaps he will hear me. If he does, and is able to come to my aid, perhaps together we can defeat the Borg and save the Enterprise. The Senior Officers have ordered the self-destruct sequence. The collective informs me that the sacrifice of the ship will not stop the Borg. This must end with the Queen. I must attempt to establish contact with the Captain before the ship is destroyed. He may be the only hope, not only for me, but for the future of the Federation. As I reach for the residue of Locutus, and from him to the real Captain Jean-Luc Picard, I shield part of my mind from the collective. They must not know my plans, either for bringing the Captain or for removing this organic skin. I do not want it; the price is too high. I will not sacrifice the future of all life in order to achieve my own perfection. The Queen said she is the one from many. If I do as she wishes, I will be her equal, but at the cost of my friends and everything we and others have struggled to achieve and uphold.

Humans have risen above slavery. However, the Borg see their actions not as slavery, but as a service to the greater good. In that way, I am equal to the Queen. What I do now, I do for the future of not only humanity, but of all races who have not been assimilated. What I do now, I also do for the greater good.


End file.
